Having something to write about and not knowing how to start is one of the struggles I have with updating my blog. But you reading this definitely means I started already, so yeah.
If you followed up with my last blog, I mentioned I was going to write about ungrateful people. This is actually a sensitive topic for me, and honestly, for anyone and everyone who has in one way or another dealt with people who made you question if you ever did anything for them.
I used to be an advocate of carrying people's problems on my head. I was that person who would go above and beyond, putting everyone else's needs before my own. But as time goes on, you learn to choose yourself first. And sometimes, that lesson comes the hard way—through dealing with people who just don't know how to appreciate anything.
Ungrateful people will always find something wrong, even with your best gestures. Whatever you do will never be enough. You might be thinking you've done the world for them, and boom—you won't even get the same energy you were expecting. It's like throwing your kindness into a black hole.
Nobody wants to deal with those kinds of people. I'm not saying you should bow to anybody and start rolling on the floor because they've helped you, but there are levels of being appreciative that let you know deep down that this person is genuinely grateful. You can feel it in their response, see it in their actions, hear it in their voice.
But ungrateful people? They forget favors so quickly. Give them 30 minutes and they've completely forgotten what you did. And they're the most entitled people you'll ever deal with. They act like the world owes them everything, like your kindness is just the bare minimum they deserve.
There's a huge difference between someone having high standards and being genuinely ungrateful. High standards mean they appreciate good things when they receive them, but they just have specific preferences. Ungrateful people, on the other hand, will find fault with a diamond because it's not big enough, complain about a free meal because it wasn't their favorite cuisine, or dismiss your efforts because you didn't read their mind about exactly how they wanted to be helped.
Sometimes we act like we're not pained by their attitude because we don't want it to seem like we're counting favors. But yeah, we're all human. If you've ever dealt with someone like that and found yourself second-guessing your own kindness, questioning whether you're being too sensitive or not doing enough—it's definitely not you. I'm sure you did your best.
It's okay if you're pained by their response. It's okay to feel hurt when your genuine efforts are dismissed or taken for granted. I genuinely express myself when I'm pained by such people so I can get over it quickly. Bottling it up only makes it worse.
The hard truth is that some people are just takers. They're so used to receiving that they've forgotten how to give—even something as simple as gratitude. They've convinced themselves that they deserve everything they get and more, so nothing you do will ever feel special to them.
Learning to spot these people early can save you so much emotional energy. Watch how they talk about others who have helped them. Notice if they ever acknowledge the good things people do for them, or if every story is about how someone didn't do enough. Pay attention to whether they ever show genuine appreciation for anything, or if they're always focused on what's missing.
It doesn't mean you should stop being kind or helpful. It just means you should be selective about where you invest your energy. Your kindness is valuable—don't waste it on people who will never see its worth.
And to anyone reading this who recognizes themselves in the "ungrateful" description—it's not too late to change. Gratitude is a practice, and it starts with recognizing that nobody owes you anything. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, is a choice someone made to make your life a little better. That deserves acknowledgment.
The world has enough takers. We need more people who know how to receive with grace and give back with genuine appreciation.